Prayer Group Advice

Tell us about your prayer group experience. What have you learned by being in a prayer group? How do you conduct your group time? What works and doesn’t work for you? Give advice and share experiences and encouragement. You Moms In Touch gals out there—let’s hear from you!

Check out the paper on the power of agreement.

Praying Out Loud

Thank you, Karen, for letting us use your honesty for a launching pad to discuss this fear and for those of you who took the time to leave a comment. May I suggest that when you are leading a prayer group, do not set things up so that any person is going to be forced to pray out loud. Don’t go “in order.’ Let people pray conversationally—short prayers, entering into the ongoing conversation as they want to.

Here is a passage from Heart’s Cry, Chapter 9, which is about praying in groups. Audrey is my mother, Audrey Kennedy.

Before this small prayer group started, Audrey’s experiences in group praying had not been encouraging. “In my experience, you went around the room and prayed in order. There were so many ways to be intimidated. If the person right before you said what you were going to say, then what? Or if someone prayed so eloquently and beautifully, how could you follow that? I was always busy listening to people’s words, not to their prayers. I felt put on the spot. I felt it my Christian responsibility to come up with a good, heart‑felt prayer.”

When Audrey’s first prayer group began, she didn’t define it as a prayer group. They were a group of women who wanted to know more about prayer. They began to learn that they didn’t have to use anyone’s church or denominational language. They used conversational prayer. The women from this prayer group helped each other become aware of God in every situation. They helped each other tear down barriers to intimacy. When they were together, their attention was focused on realizing the power of God among them. Even when they were addressing each other in conversation, they knew that God was communicating through and among them. This group met weekly for years and still retain a deep bond today, even though the members live in different cities. They are still actively involved in prayer for one another.

Since then, Audrey has started three other prayer groups. Each one started when people felt a need to learn more about prayer and asked Audrey if she would help them. The second prayer group started when three women from three denominational backgrounds expressed to Audrey their hunger to know how to pray. Eight women attended their first meeting. In a month attendance had grown to 32. They met weekly and soon expanded the time allotted from one hour to two. From this prayer group, a couples’ prayer group and another women’s prayer group began. Audrey met weekly with the original group for five years, until she moved away. When she left, the groups were still going. (Heart’s Cry, Chapter 9)

the freedom of obedience

Here is something I wrote during my late husband's illness. Today's events in my life have reminded me that when I think I am being restricted, I am really being protected. Blessings, friends.

The Freedom of Obedience
Today as I sat beside Wayne's hospital bed, I watched a parable in action.Wayne is being fed and medicated by IV right now. Lots of tubes acting as the conduit through which life and healing flow. Wayne is very restless. He keeps moving his arm in such a way that the IV lines get tangled and the healing flow can't get to him. When he starts moving his arm too much, we have to take his hand and gently hold it down so he won't get the lines tangled. It frustrates him. He feels we are restricting his freedom. He is missing the context. All he knows is he wants his hand to move and we want it to be still. He can't see that what he thinks is restriction is really freedom-- freedom to receive the flow that sustains his life.

Like Wayne, we often chafe at God's call to obedience, thinking it restricts us. Our view is narrow. We can't see that His loving hand on ours is freedom. It keeps us in the place where His power and provision flow. It keeps us from moving out of the flow of His Life.

This morning when I got to Wayne's room, they had tied that restless hand to the bed with just enough give that he had freedom, but not license. In other words, he could move his hand, but only within the confines of that which was safe for him. It was a comfortable, soft little cuff around his wrist, but it surprised me and hurt me when I saw it. I thought, how much better when the discipline comes from a loving hand. How much better when that "restriction" is accompanied with a loving touch and gentle words instead of in a impersonal "law" that has no heart.

See how much God loves us? His guidance comes to us from His loving hand, accompanied by His gentle voice, until we learn by experience that His commands set us free."I will run in the path of your commands,for you have set my heart free" (Ps 119:32).

Challenge for Today

Refuse to be average. Let your heart soar as high as it will. (A.W. Tozer)

Afraid to pray out loud?

Many, many people have a great fear of praying out loud. You, too? Common, common issue. Let's talk about it. Here is an email I recieved recently, and with permission, I am sharing it with you. If you are struggling with the same fear, let's walk this out together. Have you conquered that fear? Share some insight. Have some encouragement? Share it. Are you a leader who needs to understand that many in your group have this fear? In fact, there are many people who will not attend events for fear they may be called on to pray aloud. Here is Karen's email:

I have been a Christian all my life. My family attends a Lutheran church and I attend a weekly Bible study class at a very large church which is an Evang.-Free. (In fact they are doing your "Live A Praying Life" study this fall). I have what I perceive as a BIG stumbling block. Even though I am a strong believer and Jesus is an integral part of who I am, I cannot pray outloud (and have a really hard time even putting my thoughts in words to pray it silently). When the Bible study ends they do open prayer or go around the circle and everyone (except me) adds on to it. I panic. The other attenders are very supportive and say it will come with practice. They encourage me to just say what is in my heart. I have even asked God to help me but nothing comes--is like a break in the connection between my heart and my spoken word. I am almost afraid to do your study this fall but I am signing up for it anyway. (I imagine since the subject is prayer, the group will do alot of praying outloud). (What is really ironic is my son is in Sheila Walsh's new book "Get Off Your Knees and Pray."). He is 24 and has Down syndrome and even though he doesn't pray in formal prayers, he talks to God all the time (and angels). He has extremely severe sleep apnea and 2 years ago the drs. told me that medically speaking, he should be dead but that God must have a special mission for him that has not been completed yet. I feel a oneness with God in my soul and inner self but can't seem to get it out to pray in words. What is wrong with me? It seems everyone can pray outloud but me. Do you think I should take your course or will I stick out? Thank you so much for reading this.

OK. What do you have to say to Karen? Use the comments link. In a few days, I will post some of my responses. You're smarter than I am! What do you have to say?

Starting Again

You can see that it has been a long, long time since I have blogged. Many of you will know that my darling husband, Wayne, was diagnosed in October 2005 with brain cancer and he passed away on December 13, 2005. During that time I kept a blog to keep everyone updated on our situation. If you want to visit that blog, it is at www.waynedean.blogspot.com. I would love for you to visit the blog and read our sons' tributes to him.

Anyway, I have been recovering for two and a half years now. I think I'm almost back. I explained to my friends, "A widow now lives in my body. I don't know her. She falls apart and cries and does all kinds of things I can't control. I never know what to expect of her." I think in this third year of widowhood, the widow and I have integrated. I recognize myself now. Tears still come unexpectedly, even after the passage of time, but not as often and not as freely.

I am taking up blogging again. I'll try really hard to blog weekly. Visit again soon.